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With Halloween approaching, I think it is important for everyone to stay safe. Here are some Halloween safety tips that I think everyone should take seriously!

Please use these helpful hints this and every year.

1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it is really dead.

2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.

4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.

5. When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off and go alone.

6. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

7. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.

8. If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and find out that it's just the cat, GET THE HELL OUT!

9. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short circuits; just GET OUT.

10. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

11. If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.

12. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.

13. Dress appropriately. When investigating a noise downstairs in an old house, women should not wear a flimsy negligee. And carry a flashlight, not a candle.

14. If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, kill them immediately.

15. If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are female. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

16. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street , Transylvania, Nilbog (you're in trouble if you recognize this one), anywhere in Texas where chainsaws are sold, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine .

17. If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had most of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be eaten.

18. Beware of strangers bearing tools. For example: chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased companions.

19. If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the time to move in with the in- laws. This also applies to houses that had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices.

20. Do not mention the names of demons around open flames, as these can flare suddenly. Be especially careful of fireplaces in this regard.

21. Do not go looking for witches in the Maryland countryside.

22. If your grandfather has just returned from a trip and gives you an old Mayan artifact he found, throw it away as far as possible.

23 If you have heard a noise in the house and called out but nobody answers, especially if someone is supposed to be there, don't proceed to take a bath/shower.

24. And another zombie survival tip; if there is someone in the group who sees their significant other/dog/child/parent among the living dead and wants to "Help Them" make sure you either tie them up or get rid of them since they will eventually let in the zombies.

Oh! and a trailer of the Nightmare on Elm Street just came out! Granted, I will have a newborn when it comes out, so I will have to wait to see it. Still, I am always excited about new horror movies coming out. Especially the movies that I saw as a child and was terrified of. (*note to self, when the baby gets to be 8 years old, make sure he or she does not watch Nightmare on Elm Street*)